UGH! Yesterday was pure hell. I have dsymenorreah (painful periods) which has recently morphed into the severe catergory. It's like having the flu and food poisening at the same time one day a month. But I swear yesterday felt like someone was trying to poison me.
Whenever I get sick I always end up feeling so lonely and wanting my mother. I called her. She said she was going to call me back and then forgot. That did not help with the lonely feeling. But I never had anyone to take care of me when I was sick so it's strange for sickness to bring loneliness. Even with my ex. He didn't give a shit if I was sick. I had gotten food poisoning once and Mini was a baby. It was Christmas Eve. So my best friend had to come and take Mini because I couldn't take care of him. That doesn't sound strange. But it isn't like his father didn't live in the same apartment. So if he wouldn't even take care of him he damn sure wasn't taking care of me.
But Mini is such a good little boy when I'm sick which also helps the loneliness. I had to have a friend pick him up for me. He came in. Rubbed my head kissed me and told me don't worry I didn't have to get up. He would make his dinner. He got some pizza bites, put them on a plate in the microwave and asked what numbers to press. And when they were done he took them in his room and ate. At some point I woke up and panicked because I hadn't heard any noise. I called out to him - nothing. So I dragged myself into his room and he had put on pajamas and put himself to bed.
I always tell myself to stop being such a baby when I feel lonely though because I'm not the only single person in the world without someone to take care of them when they're sick. And to be honest with you I really wouldn't want anyone to see me looking like that anyway. I looked like dude.... what's his name.... the reggae dude who bleached his skin.... Vybz Kartel
Yeah.... That's what I was looking like
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