Wednesday, November 30, 2011

My conclusion is...

Oh My Gosh I can't stand men!  I really really can't. I try and be positive.  I really do.  I really really do. I try and read UN's blog and keep hope.  And believe.  I listen to Crab and what he says about men and there being good men out there blah blah blah and you know what




And he didn't particularly do anything. Its just when we have the conversation about how I don't trust any man and honestly day by day I trust him less and less.  Love him more and more but trust him less (what's that about?  We will revisit that at some point) he says that. Ugh!  I can barely even write it all out!  He says there are good men. I say they are all peices of shit and show themselves to be peices of shit before I even get a chance to give them a chance.  Let's run down all these dudes I've encountered.... case studies if you will...

Case study 1
The Barber
The barber was the first dude I spoke with after the husband.  He was cute.  Nice body and all.  Owned a barbershop...  so anyway.  He came over a couple of times we fooled around a bit.  But wanted him to want to get to know me.  He texted a lot.  Never called. I invited him out he'd stand me up.  He always wanted to come over and fuck.  I never gave it to him.  I tried to get to know him and for him to get to know me.  No dice.  He stopped calling

Case study 2
The Coach
Met. Him at the bar.  Had good convo about relationships.  He seemed like a really great guy.  I talked to him maybe five minutes on the phone once.  Then... just texts.  A couple of how's ur day... good... texts.  that's it.  Then there was a big snow storm and he texts that maybe he could come keep me warm. I text back to him I don't have male company.  He says back

I wanna play santa and come down your chimney.

I text back lose my number

His name was then changed to DO NOT ANSWER.  What the fuck did I ever say to you to make you think that sexual inuendos were appropriate.  Jack shit.  I'aint say Jack Shit for you to think it was ok.

Case study 3
The bulldog
A dude bought me a drink.  Then he said that I shouldn't be drinking without eating so he told me to order myself some food.  I did.  He then proceeded to stand next to me and glare at anyone that even stopped to say hi to me.  He was like a bulldog.  I should have x'ed that shit then and there but my drunk ass always give these fuckers my phone number.  He calls and we are just chatting.  I told him I was at target and he says he lives around there. And then he says I should come have a drink at his place. I tell him no that I don't do that.  It was like he didn't even hear me he kept repeating that shit and I in turn had to keep repaeating myself that no I do not go over dudes house and especially not to drink.  Then I tell him besides I have my son with me.  Don't you know this motherfucker said I should bring him with me?  What in the entire fuck was in his brain.  Who the fuck did he think he was talking to? His name was then changed to DO NOT ANSWER

Case Study 4
The Dad
I met him at a bar (of course). I was dancing with his friends all night but he had a swag to him that night that I liked.  We exchanged numbers.  He took me to dinner in the city.  It was mediocre. The only time he was talkative was when speaking about his twin daughters.  First of all he was walking fast as shit and not even waiting for me.  I was damn near jogging behind him.  Second he didn't even talk to me at dinner.  Just looked around.  He was alright. I saw potential though.  Great job.  Good father. He talked about other places he wanted to take me... then his next idea to meet up was telling me that I should order the fight (the was a fight on) and he'd come over with food and drinks.  I told him no I don't entertain men in my home especially not with drinks but I really enjoyed his company and maybe we could hookup some where.  See I let him know I'm not about that fucking on my couch life after one date.  I did not have to put him in do not answer because after that he put me in DO NOT CALL.

Case study 5
The Owner
He owned a bar/lounge. He was funny and lively.  He hit me on some sexual shit one night while I was there.  I told him I don't have sex outside of a relation ship.  He told me he wanted to be my man.  Then he told me one thing though.... I couldn't tell anyone we were together because part of his success was women thinking he was available.  He did not get put in do not answer because he let me drink for free. But I did tell him we couldn't be together.


Scientifically speaking. If you were to do an experiment and each time you performed said experiment the result was consistant wouldn't you use the evidence as your conclusion?

My hypothesis is that men ain't shit when it comes to me and relationships and my case studies resulted in men not being shit.  In conclusion...

Men ain't shit!


  1. Yes, men can be idiots but the same can be said about a woman. "Oh My Gosh I can't stand men! I really really can't" can also be turned into "Oh My Gosh, I can't stand women! I really really can't." I see you blamed the MEN you encountered for all your problems(things not going as you like) but what about your own faults and contributions to those problems? "Scientifically speaking. If you were to do an experiment and each time you performed said experiment the result was consistant wouldn't you use the evidence as your conclusion?" No. First of all your sample size is too small. Secondly, said experiment was bias by your self-fulfilling prophecy (Men ain't shit!). Third, I do not know you but from reading this one post, I surmise you need time to heal.

  2. And that is why I don't date. I just don't have the energy or the patience to weed out all the a**holes trying to find the one diamond in a pile of dogsh*t. I also seem to attract the dudes who text like it's going out of style but don't know how to actually dial a number and CALL. I seem to be a magnet for dudes who think it's ok to talk nasty to me and try and come over to my house after one conversation. So I just don't do it. I stay away from all the obvious singles haunts. I avoid dating sites and singles parties. I'm happily (for the most part) antisocial. I feel your pain, girl.

  3. Anonymous - yes of course the same can be said about anyone/thing. But I personally can't stand them right now. I of course have faults. No one is perfect. But from the experiences I have it has been them. If I were to have my exes write about their experiences with me I can guarantee they would have great things to say about me and admit to being at fault.

    As far as the sample size... at the ripe old age of 34 these are just the men I've encountered in the last 2 years. What I have seen from male friends and family members and I mean every single one supports my assumption. I wouldn't call it a self fulfilling prophecy because up until recent I saw the good in everybody. I have never been like like this. I believed. I really did.... but I get angry like this whenever Crab and I have relationship talks. I think some of the anger comes from issues I have with him as well. I don't know... I was having a bad day. Then hearing him talk about relationships while we float into year 3 of our pseudo relationship I was feeling jaded.

    Thanks for your comment though. I definitely appreciate input and honesty :)

    Laki - what is it about the complete lack of control. Its like why can't they hold it in for a little while? Why must they immediately jump right in to the BS?

  4. All I can say is keep it moving. No need to label the entire species. I laugh and go about my day. When you're in a comfortable place which I thought you were with Crab no one else from my past would effect how I was in the present. :)

  5. Yeah Nony... I don't know where I am. I need to go to therapy... All of these fears I have are crippling...

  6. I understand the frustration but I have a small speckle of hope set aside that forces me to believe that there ARE good men out there. There has to be, otherwise I will remain single forever and that's not something I want. Take a shouldn't be so complicated.