Monday, February 14, 2011

Answers To Moniques Questions

So I decided to answer Monique's question in a post.

Monique Says: Why did you choose not to see other people?
I choose not to because I was always just trying to replace him. I was trying to leave him before he left me. I found myself only interested in men who had his physical attributes. And while it is okay to have a type it is not okay to try and find a replacement. That's just weird. And then when I finally found what I wanted. His height, his shade, his body type, his style of dress it turned out flat and disappointing. We all remember the Homeboy debockle **see footnote. Because even if I replaced him physically I can't replace his personality. That will never happen. So I decided to be honest with myself about where my heart is. My heart is with him. And even though we don't have a comitment, I have a lot of what I need as far as partnership in him. I feel like we are a team. So for the most part there is not that much of a void other than the security factor. And even though I FEEL safe it doesn't necessarilly mean that I am safe. But I sure do feel safe.

Monique Says: Have you guys had a discussion to make it exclusive? I asked him once why we arent together and his answer was "I don't know how to answer that" I didn't probe because I'd rather not know than to know and not have him in my life anymore.

Monique Says: Better yet, what is it that you want the end to be with you guys?Here come the tears. (I must be ovulating). I rarely think about titles. I do think about wanting to be there when he's old and gray. In the end I want to love him the way I do now... always.

**Homeboy Debockle. I found someone who met my physical Crabquirements, and I named him Junior here. But then when I got to know him I realized he couldn't get the title of Junior because he WASN'T even remotely close. And I couldn't even name homeboy so I just ended up calling him Homeboy.


  1. Sorry for the tears hun. (((hugs)))

  2. ok so that made me cry to *wipes tears* I can understand everything u spoke i this! I've been there and done that and it made me sad just thinking about it

  3. Awwww. Thanks ladies. But the tears aren't actaually sad tears at the last part. I'm just very emotional. So sometimes when I think about love it makes me cry. Id cry thinking about how much I love Mini. But I told him once he'd never have to worry about who's gonna take care of him when he's old. Even if he's married to someone else. Id tell that bitch she's gotta move! Its time for his sponge bath!